.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
