Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
