i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
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I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
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She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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