Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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