woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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