HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
