When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Randomize