The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
