they're staring at me
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?