So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Randomize
