Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
