is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
