Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
