Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
