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I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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