I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Randomize