Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
