I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
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I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
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Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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