Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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