Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Randomize
