google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Randomize