Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
You are the jesus of drinking
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
