i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
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