so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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