...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize