Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize