hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize
