also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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