I am in a vortex of obligation.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Randomize
