i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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