Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
