do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize