I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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