Texts From Last Night

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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.

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  (931): Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person. http://tfl.nu/od1c
  Replies (46) Good night (7096) Bad night (927)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.

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  (484): Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome. http://tfl.nu/6dfu
  Replies (25) Good night (7338) Bad night (1198)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".

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  (205): That's why they call him "the cheesegrater". http://tfl.nu/ctav
  Replies (6) Good night (864) Bad night (3689)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.

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  (+61): Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme. http://tfl.nu/6yp3
  Replies (14) Good night (2776) Bad night (1265)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.

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  (484): You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night. http://tfl.nu/9q4k
  Replies (9) Good night (3281) Bad night (823)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub

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  (410): In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub http://tfl.nu/jeln
  Replies (5) Good night (2171) Bad night (778)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Threesome in a minivan. New low

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  (907): Threesome in a minivan. New low http://tfl.nu/igpy
  Replies (15) Good night (1828) Bad night (989)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.

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  (812): I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday. http://tfl.nu/ol7y
  Replies (11) Good night (2401) Bad night (747)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!

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  (208): WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY! http://tfl.nu/ts4x
  Replies (7) Good night (1057) Bad night (1273)
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  (835): View more from Pennsylvania

  You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"

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  (835): You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood" http://tfl.nu/u3xk
  Replies (2) Good night (1369) Bad night (479)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.

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  (317): This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new. http://tfl.nu/2l1q
  Replies (1) Good night (763) Bad night (387)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle

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  (570): Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle http://tfl.nu/qz61
  Replies (2) Good night (958) Bad night (295)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."

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  (931): What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed." http://tfl.nu/pp3s
  Replies (3) Good night (573) Bad night (265)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.

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  (864): There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me. http://tfl.nu/gyap
  Replies (5) Good night (525) Bad night (269)
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.

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  (334): Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him. http://tfl.nu/wkpb
  Replies (1) Good night (442) Bad night (139)

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