it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
he puts the penis in happiness.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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