census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Randomize
