I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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