office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
be right there i have to get my cape
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
