Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize
