she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
i've created a new STD.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
