I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
