There is no way he is gay with that hair.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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