dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I deserve to be covered in dicks
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
