I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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