sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
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do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
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The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
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