Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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