I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
