I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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