Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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