tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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