why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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