Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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